'Breakfast's Jenny-May Clarkson reveals her new her moko kauae

Jenny-May Clarkson has revealed her new moko kauae ahead of the new week and her first time with it on television, expressing her dread for the expected emails from viewers and detailing how she plans to embrace her Māoritanga in a new light.

The Breakfast television host discussed her journey to reclaim her Māori heritage in length with 1News, with Clarkson being the first member of her family to wear moko kauae since her great-grandmother.

Sharing that she “knew nothing about moko kauae growing up”, Clarkson revealed her decision to claim a moko kauae for herself was not something that ever crossed her mind when she was younger as she “didn’t want to be Māori”.

“As a child I loved experiencing kapa haka in school. But as I grew older, I began to see a different side to how Māori were treated and perceived in the world I knew, which was mainly a Pākehā world,” Clarkson told 1News.

“By the time I’d reached my teenage years in Piopio, I refused to acknowledge that I was Māori.”

But after decades of building a successful career in netball and television, which also came with years of self-discovery and reflection, Clarkson has reconnected with her Māoritanga and found a renewed meaning in her life work, including her job as a role model for younger audiences who tune in to Breakfast every morning.

“I’d love to tell that confused little kid and her older teenage self: one day you will love yourself. That feeling you get when you stand on stage proudly wearing your kapa haka kākahu, belting out waiata, that feeling of pride and belonging, that will remain with you.”

Now, Clarkson has claimed her moko kauae and is preparing for her first show on television wearing it.

She acknowledged her anxiety about the public’s reaction to her moko kauae, revealing that she has struggled with what people would say on the first day she had it.

Describing her terrible sleep thinking about it, Clarkson said: “Just very real doubts started to creep in. What is everybody going to say? I don’t want to go back to work, you know.”

“I can see the emails, I can see the responses already and all of that was just going through my head.”

But the fears eventually subsided, with Clarkson recalling a sudden calmness that lifted her up and out of her thoughts.

“I can’t even explain to you how it all just lifted but it was gone.”

Clarkson is proud to have gone through the process of receiving her moko kauae and discussed how much it has meant to her. She wanted to share the personal moment with only her husband Dean, mum Paddy and older sister Alicia.

Describing her moko kauae’s design and the story of her whakapapa that it tells, Clarkson said: “My kauae represents both my mum and dad. Mum from Ngāti Kahu and my dad from Ngāti Maniapoto, although my son says the four koru represent him and his brother, Dean and me. I like his thinking.”

Clarkson will embrace her moko kauae on screen and insists that she’s “still the same person”. However, she acknowledged that some Breakfast viewers will struggle to look past it.

“Everybody is on their own journey and I understand if perhaps some members of our audience find it abrasive. But this is still me. I just choose to wear who I am now.”

This article was first published by the NZ Herald and is republished here with permission.